Perfectly Imperfect Mom

As parents I think we all struggle with different things our child is going through and how to go about handling them.

Some of my struggles having been Ace's hitting, which I have talked about before and now I am struggling with setting limits.

The reason I say I struggle is because I want him to explore in order to learn. I want him to make mistakes and learn from them. I want him to understand it's ok to have fun and enjoy what the world has to offer. So where does the struggling come in? Well, I think part of me thinks maybe I need to set some limits when it comes to doing certain things but then a bigger part of me says a 16 month old isn't going to understand some of those limits. Certain ones, yes, he does understand and we set them and work on them but others I go back and forth on if I should start setting them now or allow him to explore and figure things out. I don't just let him go off on his own but I do watch him and see what he is going to do. I do not believe in being a helicopter parent and stressing about every little thing your child touches or helping them every step of the way. Ace is very smart and I love watching him learn and figure things out. He has always been the type of person to examine things and try to see how it works. It is part of his personality and I don't want to stomp on that or somehow punish that part of him.

If he wants to go over and play in dirt to feel the texture and see what it is all about than I am all for it. If he wants to paint and make a mess (outside is best for this) than who am I do tell him to not rub paint on his belly or get it in his hair? Granted I don't want him painting on things he should but I feel like he has years to be told not to get dirty and to color inside the lines so why not let him get a little messy?

I do try to set some boundaries of course. I get very upset (by upset I mean I feel bad that he has hurt his friend but do not get upset with him) when he smacks a friend in the face and we show him how to be gentle or tell him to be nice. We are working on not throwing our sippy and our next big thing is not throwing food by giving him real life consquences like taking the food away until he can stop throwing it but I am not just going to go around tell him no or don't do that because honestly, he likes to get a reaction but doesn't like his food being taken away.



It is a learning process but it is one that I think we are doing pretty well at. We are fortunate to have a child who rarely ever whines, who loves to play, learn, explore and be friendly to people. These are qualities I just love about him. He is so outgoing and independent as well as charismatic. He is by no means a spoiled child and I love that as well. He does test us at times and has his moments like any child but I think overall we are truly lucky. Knowing this helps me when I start to think maybe I should do this instead of that or maybe I am doing this wrong or should I be more stern? Should I be doing this or that? In the end I hope he will be a polite, happy, sweet, loving person and I think we are on the right track but man, who knew parenting could be so tough sometimes.

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This past weekend my son and I went to my friend's daughter's first birthday party. He had a great time jumping on the toddler bounce house and pushing around a pink stroller. He also fell in love with the huge Froggy character they had come see the birthday girl. He literally would not let the thing go!  After the party we went home and played and took some silly pictures. Ace is obsessed with cameras. He will bring me the camera and say "cheese". So cute! Since I am linking up with the anderson crew for Embrace the Camera I decided to put up some of our silly pictures together.

My favorite! Fishy Face and Crazy Face!

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As a mother of a very independent, outgoing and loud toddler I have learned a thing or two in the short time I have been a mother to this toddling little disaster.  First of all no matter how well behaved your toddler is they will always throw a fit at the least convenient time. This is when you want to crawl under a rock and hide till they stop because in that moment you feel like your child is going to explode from being so pissed off. What have I learned from this? Well, first of all, when your toddler is throwing a tantrum, the last thing that is going to make your toddler calm down is yelling at or spanking them. I mean, if you are pissed off at someone, is them reacting to you in anger going to make you cool down? No. 

The start of crocodile tears!

The tears stopped the second he realized I was going to take a picture. He is already a ham!

Now I am not saying I am perfect and always handle these situations with the perfect amount of grace and control but I do try. Distractions are also my friend in these situations. Usually Ace will get upset and if we move him along to something more interesting he stops whining. If that doesn't work sometimes just letting the tantrum run its course is all that needs to be done. That isn't always the easiest thing to handle if you are stressed and in a hurry but I am telling you, these kids can smell fear, and will act on it! 

Playing with his friend before he later bit her :-(

Biting, hitting, pinching, pushing and pulling hair seems to also be one of the many "joys" of toddlerhood. Ace has done some of these to some of his little friends and I can tell you every time I felt like the worlds worse mother. I know Ace isn't a "bad" or mean child. He is quite the opposite. He is easy going and friendly but he is still trying to figure out how to get what he wants, what is and isn't going to hurt his friend and sometimes does things because he wants to see what will happen. He has had these things done to him as well and of course I understand that this isn't some defective toddler harming my child and the parents aren't going around teaching them its ok to act like this. It is a fact of life, some or most toddlers are going to have a time in their life when they do something to hurt their friend and to put it simply, it sucks.

He wouldn't let go of this Frog!

What's mine is mine and what's yours is mine! This is something I watch on a daily basis with Ace and his little friends. They all want the same toy at the same time. If someone else has it, too bad, someone is taking it from the other one. Toddlers think they own everything. Heck, I was at the doctors and I was giving Ace some yogurt melts and a little girl came up to me and tried to grab them from me. She probably has them at her house and just assumed they belong to her. Her father apologized but seriously? My kid would have done the same thing, I am sure of it.

Care free and happy!

I am not saying all of Toddlerhood is scary. In fact I love this age. My son is hysterical, lovable and still thinks I am pretty awesome. He even has his own signature booty dance. To be honest he is free entertainment when we go to parties. He loves to make others laugh. Its just a skill he already has leaving us to believe we are in big trouble when he starts school. Class clown, anyone? He loves his friends, is carefree and has a true zest for life. No matter how many times I want to pull my hair out or scream there are 100 more times I want to just hang out with my little guy because to me, he really is the most amazing person on this planet. Check out the current Giveaway!